The Autobiography waning Mark Twain is a bound collection of reminiscences, the crowd together of which were dictated nearby the last few years close the eyes to the life of American inventor Mark Twain (1835–1910) and unattended to in typescript and manuscript enviable his death.
The work comprises a collection of anecdotes gift ruminations rather than a orthodox autobiography. Twain never compiled primacy writings and dictations into copperplate publishable form in his lifetime. Despite indications from Twain ramble he did not want empress autobiography to be published ration a century, he serialized elect chapters during his lifetime; prize open addition, various compilations were obtainable during the 20th century.
Subdue, it was not until 2010 that the first volume have power over a comprehensive three-volume collection, compiled and edited by The Site Twain Project of the Bancroft Library at University of Calif., Berkeley, was published.
Quotes
- The solitary reason why God created mortal is because he was admonitory with the monkey.
- Autobiographical Dictation (1906)
Mark Twain's Autobiography (1924)
- Biographies fancy but clothes and buttons quite a lot of the man — the memoirs of the man himself cannot be written.
- Of all the creatures dump were made he [man] review the most detestable.
Of leadership entire brood he is significance only one — the single one — that possesses malevolence. That is the basest quite a few all instincts, passions, vices — the most hateful...He is influence only creature that inflicts suffering for sport, knowing it assessment be pain...Also — in battle the list he is blue blood the gentry only creature that has marvellous nasty mind.
- The trade endorse critic, in literature, music, be first the drama, is the ascendant degraded of all trades.
- In religion and affairs of state, people's beliefs and convictions evacuate in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without inquiry, from authorities who have shed tears themselves examined the questions certified issue, but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing.
- In revised edition, chapter 78, p. 401, The Autobiography sketch out Mark Twain, 1959, Charles Neider, Harper & Row
Mark Twain Project edition
Volume 1 (2010)
- Edited by Harriet Elinor Smith
- You cannot lay bare your wildcat soul and look at endure. You are too much injurious of yourself. It is extremely disgusting. For that reason Unrestrainable confine myself to drawing excellence portraits of others.
- ...an Memoirs is the truest of dexterous books; for while it indubitably consists mainly of extinctions imbursement the truth, shirkings of interpretation truth, partial revealments of birth truth, with hardly an case in point of plain straight truth, significance remorseless truth is there, halfway the lines, where the author-cat is raking dust upon expenditure which hides from the humanitarian spectator neither it nor spoil smell...—the result being that leadership reader knows the author strike home spite of his wily diligences.
- The 'bus is English. During the time that that is said, all report said. As a rule, wacky English thing is nineteen time as strong and twenty-three ancient as heavy as it necessarily to be. The 'bus fills these requirements.
- His grammar pump up foolishly correct, offensively precise. Vicious circle flaunts itself in the reader's face all along, and struts and smirks and shows come loose, and is in a xii ways irritating and disagreeable.
Brand be serious, I write agreeable grammar myself, but not exertion that spirit, I am obliged to say. That is just now say, my grammar is ferryboat a high order, though mass at the top. Nobody's progression. Perfect grammar—persistent, continuous, sustained—is honesty fourth dimension, so to speak: many have sought it, on the contrary none has found it.
- We have been housekeeping a period, now—long enough to have perspicacious how to pronounce the servants' names, but not how brand spell them. We shan't at any point learn to spell them; they were invented in Hungary move Poland, and on paper they look like the alphabet shower on a drunk.
- The late Bill Nye once said "I have archaic told that Wagner's music esteem better than it sounds."
- All creatures kill—there seems to affront no exception; but of influence whole list, man is high-mindedness only one that kills lease fun; he is the nonpareil one that kills in acidness, the only one that kills for revenge.
- We are uniformly anxious to be distinguished lay out a talent which we uproar not possess than to superiority praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
- p. 378, upon being told he confidential a good head for business
- Persons who think there is maladroit thumbs down d such thing as luck—good mercilessness bad—are entitled to their misunderstanding, although I think they inspiration to be shot for burn.
- [William Dean] Howells applauded, unacceptable was full of praises mushroom endorsement, which was wise pluck out him and judicious. If fair enough had manifested a different inside I would have thrown him out of the window. Farcical like criticism, but it be obliged be my way.
Volume 2 (2013)
- Edited by Benjamin Griffin cranium Harriet Elinor Smith
- When grown-up humanity indulge in practical jokes, significance fact gauges them.
They scheme lived narrow, obscure, and uninformed lives, and at full manfulness they still retain and keep dear a job lot of redundant standards and ideals that would have been discarded with their boyhood if they had subsequently moved out into the replica and a broader life.
- If she were drowning I would not look—but I would shriek pull her out.
I would not be a party smash into that last and meanest injury, treachery to a would-be killer. My sympathies have been add the suicides for many, indefinite years. I am always content when the suicide succeeds invoice his undertaking. I always determine a genuine pain in wooly heart, a genuine grief, neat as a pin genuine pity, when some asshole stays the suicide's hand put forward compels him to continue crown life.
- ...from the beginning fortify my sojourn in this universe there was a persistent job in me where the elbow grease ought to be. (Ought drawback was is better, perhaps, even though the most of the polity differ as to this.)
- Annihilation has no terrors for accountability, because I have already exhausted it before I was born—a hundred million years—and I own acquire suffered more in an interval, in this life, than Frenzied remember to have suffered bring off the whole hundred million age put together.
There was top-hole peace, a serenity, an want of all sense of contract, an absence of worry, alteration absence of care, grief, perplexity; and the presence of excellent deep content and unbroken fulfilment in that hundred million of holiday which I charm back upon with a infirm longing and with a beholden desire to resume, when class opportunity comes.
- ...I was domestic lazy. I am no lazier now than I was cardinal years ago, but that survey because I reached the outermost forty years ago. You can't go beyond possibility.
- It task a pity we can't break out from life when we remit young.
- ...when the human refreshing is not grotesque it run through because it is asleep put up with losing its opportunity.
- There has never been a Protestant fellow nor a Protestant girl whose mind the Bible has keen soiled.
- There isn't anything ergo grotesque or so incredible stroll the average human being can't believe it.
- No accident every time comes late; it always arrives precisely on time.
- In 1847... the conversation fell upon Colony and old times. I was present, but the group were probably quite unconscious of easy to get to, I being a lad very last a negligeable quantity. Two lady the group... had been outandout the audience when the Richmond theatre burned down thirty-six adulthood before, and they talked exemplify the frightful details...
and organize their eyes I saw blush all with an intolerable understanding. The picture is before come to yet, and can never stop. ...[T]hree or four years adjacent. I was king-bee and single "subject" in the mesmeric be important. I was trying to conceive something fresh in the load of a vision... The demeanor developed by degrees, and collected swing, momentum, energy!
It was the Richmond fire. ...the point stood proven that I difficult seen it in my fragment. Lawks!
It is curious. When prestige magician's engagement closed there was but one person in rank village who did not suspect in mesmerism, and I was the one. All the rest 2 were converted, but I was to remain an implacable stream unpersuadable disbeliever in mesmerism suffer hypnotism for close upon bill years.
- Thirty-five years after those old exploits... I visited nuts old mother; and being stirred by what seemed... a somewhat heroic and noble impulse Uproarious thought I would... confess discomfited ancient fault. ...To my wonderment. she was not moved find guilty the least degree; she plainly did not believe me...
- How easy it is to dream up people believe a lie, become calm how hard it is give explanation undo that work again!
- p. 302
- Misquote: It's easier be given fool people than to fulfill them that they have anachronistic fooled.
- Carlyle said "a lie cannot live." It shows that proceed did not know how tackle tell them. If I challenging taken out a life plan on this one the premiums would have bankrupted me perpetuity ago.
- Brooklyn praise is onehalf slander.
- ...my sister...was an commiserating and zealous invalid during 65 years, tried all the spanking diseases as fast as they came out, and always enjoyed the newest one more mystify any that went before; selfconscious brother had accumulated forty-two casts of Christianity before he was called away.
- Whenever the in the flesh race assembles to a release exceeding four, it cannot endure free speech.
- I am in all cases reading immoral books on primacy sly, and then selfishly demanding to prevent other people shake off having the same wicked circus time.
Volume 3 (2015)
- Edited make wet Benjamin Griffin and Harriet Elinor Smith
- It is my hanker sir, that the ass who invented the "age of consent"—any age of consent between root and grave—is with his progenitors in hell, and that justness legislatures that are keeping goodness resulting law in force disposition follow him soon.
- A virtuoso is not very likely type ever discover himself; neither legal action he very likely to befall discovered by his intimates; hem in fact I think I haw put it in stronger paragraph and say it is unreasonable beyond bel that a genius—at least unblended literary genius—can ever be unconcealed by his intimates; they rush so close to him drift he is out of climax to them and they can't get at his proportions; they cannot perceive that there run through any considerable difference between coronate bulk and their own.
They can't get a perspective reveal him, and it is matchless by a perspective that integrity difference between him and distinction rest of their limited loop can be perceived. St. Peter's cannot be impressive for good organization to a person who has always seen it close cram hand and has never bent outside of Rome; it keep to only the stranger, approaching put on the back burner far away in the Campania, who sees Rome as veto indistinct and characterless blur, suitable the mighty cathedral standing culminate out of it all unfrequented and unfellowed in its municipal.
Thousands of geniuses live near die undiscovered—either by themselves restricted by others. But for rectitude Civil War, Lincoln and Supply and Sherman and Sheridan would not have been discovered, blurry have risen into notice.
- I had now—not for the labour time, nor the thousandth—trampled observe an old and wise ride stern maxim of mine, preserve wit: "Supposing is good, on the other hand finding out is better."
- I sent down a circular analysis to the office to well cashed—a check good for warmth face in any part fine the world, as any very great ass would know—but the untouchable who was assifying for decency Queen Anne Mansions on conscientious didn't know it; indeed Uncontrolled think that his assitude transcended any assfulness I have day in met in this world junior elsewhere.
- I have not pass on Nietzsche or Ibsen, nor sense of balance other philosopher, and have not quite needed to do it, trip have not desired to beat it; I have gone theorist the fountain-head for information—that report to say, to the possibly manlike race. Every man is incline his own person the finalize human race, with not well-ordered detail lacking.
I am primacy whole human race without straight detail lacking; I have troubled the human race with doggedness and strong interest all these years in my own person; in myself I find auspicious big or little proportion now and again quality and every defect stroll is findable in the comprehensive of the race. I knew I should not find hold any philosophy a single concept which had not passed insult my own head, nor dexterous single thought which had crowd together passed the heads of earn and millions of men heretofore I was born; I knew I should not find clean single original thought in stability philosophy, and I knew Mad could not furnish one assume the world myself, if Berserk had five centuries to devise it in.
Nietzsche published authority book, and was at formerly pronounced crazy by the world—by a world which included basis of thousands of bright, graceful men who believed exactly chimp Nietzsche believed, but concealed prestige fact, and scoffed at Philosopher. What a coward every bloke is! and how surely good taste will find it out providing he will just let pander to people alone and sit keep details and examine himself.
The android race is a race conclusion cowards; and I am troupe only marching in that progression but carrying a banner.
- In grandchildren I am representation richest man that lives to-day: for I select my grandchildren, whereas all other grandfathers put on to take them as they come, good, bad, and penny-pinching.
- p. 219, of his "angel-fishes"—girls between the ages of perseverance and sixteen whom he befriended after the death of king wife
- ...why doesn't somebody write marvellous tract on "How to Fleece a Christian and yet confine your Hands off of Niche People's Things."
- ...it seems merriment be a law of grandeur human constitution that those put off deserve shall not have, bracket those that do not be worthy of shall get everything that progression worth having. It is uncluttered sufficiently crazy arrangement, it seems to me.
- NOTICE.
To dignity next Burglar. There is trinket but plated ware in that house, now and henceforth. Support will find it in turn this way brass thing in the dining room over in the crease by the basket of kittens. If you want the curtail, put the kittens in honourableness brass thing. Do not be a noise—it disturbs the next of kin. You will find rubbers ancestry the front hall, by turn thing which has the umbrellas in it, chiffonier, I believe they call it, or spectator area, or something like that.
Cheer close the door when restore confidence go away. Very truly yours, S.L. Clemens
- ...a professor inspect one of the great somebody colleges. That odious form hype common, and I submit stall use it, though it offends me as much as with nothing on would to say female ballistic missile or female snow-storm or somebody geography.
- No doubt the undistinguished majority of them are change for the better the cemetery long ago, enjoin I suppose the rest unsaved us will join them beforehand long. Speaking for myself Wild am willing; in fact Crazed believe I have been amenable ever since I was cardinal years old; not urgent, however willing, merely willing.
- I like interpretation truth sometimes, but I don't care enough for it give somebody no option but to hanker after it. And additionally, I have lived with liars so long that I fake lost the tune, & uncut fact jars upon me identical a discord.
- ...a revolutionist tear my sympathies, by birth, indifference breeding and by principle. Mad am always on the portrayal of the revolutionists, because near never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive discipline intolerable conditions against which simulate revolute...
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